each day is a process, but it's something I'm willing to do and go through in order to get this boy out of my head && to find happiness . I lost myself in him, and I vow to never care as much about someone else more than myself . I loved him more than I did myself, therefore I took in a lot of shit that I wouldn't normally, because somewhere along the line I figured that he actually loved me too . However, that wasn't the case, but hey it's whatever now . he's moved on already, so I guess I shall fend for myself like I've been doing this entire I've been in this unstable relationship . I hope everything in his life goes well && I pray that one day he finds someone worth his heart, seeing as I wasn't .
, I simply don't want another relationship . I've been single for half my teenage years, I don't need a man to define who I am, however I liked the feeling it gave me . This time it'll all be different though, I'm not a virgin anymore . I'm not unique anymore, and now it's harder to fight temptation . but celibacy is a practice and vow that I made with myself && God && I'm gonna go through with it until I feel as if I'm ready . I'd do anything to take back my virginity, but all bad things happen to good people for a reason . It's a lesson learned && I'm just done with everything . I love you Loudorion Devonte Johnson , nothing will ever change that , no matter how much you hurt me . the love was real && one day you're gonna miss my love . one day soon you'll see, you'll reach out for me && I pray that that day is the day I can finally say that I'm over you .
